Identity Theft
I recently have discovered that some total asshole has stolen my identity. DO NOT think that you can somehow be protected from this by just being a regular human being. I am as about as regular a human being as there can be, and I was sitting around in my mu-mu eating truffles one morning after watching Regis and Kelly when I received a phone call. Brushing the chocolate off of my sleeve and glancing at the clock for my hourly nap, I was shocked to discover that I still had another 20 minutes before I could get more beauty sleep. So I answered the phone.
That is something I feel quite safe from since I never buy anything. What are they going to collect? I have an excellent credit rating because my wife and I buy just about everything with cash, and those things we do not buy with cash we pay on a regular basis.
This guy was asking me about a check that had my name on it from a Wal-Mart in Jacksonville, Arkansas, to about the approximate value of $1591.41. He was able to verify my address and my driver’s license number. What the hell?
Then he gave me the name of a bank that the check was issued. I have never banked with that bank……and the warning bells start to go off. So far the credit agency that called me has been really cool, and I suppose part of that was that I was perfectly happy to talk to the guy on the phone. I have nothing to hide, unless it my obsession with alphabetizing my vegetable cans in reverse order. That is embarrassing.
The clothes that should fit every single theif!!
The long and the short of it is that some ass has stolen my good name, address and driver’s license. He/She/It are writing fraudulent checks with this information. I am now facing an entire MOUNTAIN of paperwork that makes doing your taxes look like a weekend picnic.
DO NOT ever let me find you unless there are cops in the way. I can fill the air with more lead than there is oxygen, and you NEED oxygen.
When we find out who you are, and the cops get there first, (you should hope), then I will be more than happy to prosecute your sorry ass to everything the law can come up with.
I have a question. What the HELL did you find at Wal-Mart that worth nearly $1600? You needed a lifetime supply of Slim Jims? You needed to fit an entire army with rubber fishing worms? Even the tires at Wal-Mart do not cost that much. There are just not enough candle holders and CD’s to reach that kind of money. I just cannot fathom what it was you can get at Wal-Mart for that kind of jack.
GODDAMMIT! You made me get my son’s social security number before I could buy him a God-Damned one-week fishing license! Then you just take my name and driver’s license on an account that does not even exist for a whole $1600? What the hell is wrong with you losers? A fucking fishing license costs all of $16 for a week. You needed a SS# for that? Now I could have bought a stinking BOAT for the same price you took for a bad check and all I would have needed was a fraudulent check and a stolen driver’s license number????
From this date forward I am going to shave my ass and walk backwards before I will buy toilet paper at any of your backwards bullshit stores. After your MASSIVE failure to get the goods on a fraudulent check, you have the audacity to call a collection agency before you even bothered to find out if what you did in the first place was the right thing?
I feel better, now, as I face a mountain of police reports and FTC reports and buying credit reports and filing ID Theft reports with credit agencies. Sort of. I also kind of feel like Josie Wales.
Did you ever end up getting
Did you ever end up getting everything resolved credit-wise? I actually work for a company that helps educate on ID Theft and most of the responsibility these days is being placed on businesses. Everyone has to be aware of what people can use against them and how to go about the best practices with personal info etc. Once your information has been taken there's a really high chance that someone will use it again in the future - you never know if the person/people that stole it passed it along or sold it to someone else. It's a good idea to regularly monitor your credit report or use a service that does that for you. Our company offers a daily monitoring plan and if anything actually happens -they don't just tell you, they do the legwork to get it fixed for you which is the biggest headache of it all. taramulvey.com has more info on it. Best of luck to you.
I appreciate the plug there,
I appreciate the plug there, actually. I have been monitoring my credit like an insane person since that
happened.
Nihil est ad omnia parte beatum.
Hunt Em Down
That's one of the things that bothers me about WalMart. If I were a thief and found someone's credit card the first place I would head is there. Have the cashier ring it up, swipe the stolen card, sign a bogus name on the little scribbler and be out the door. No need to worry about identity checks. They only do that at Christmas.
It would piss me off so much that I'd go after the prick until I found them. There has to be a tape. And on the chance I found out who they were I'd sue them in small claims for the time I spent filling out paperwork. I wonder if you can sue WalMart for negligence if you can prove you could not have been physically present at the time of the purchase ?
oh yea
IOpian,
You bring up some good points! Namely, I think that there is liability elsewhere. Wells Fargo was the bank that these assholes "used" but they did do without even opening up an account. In other words, Wells Fargo did not come back with an 'insufficient funds' because when I had them search their system, my name DOES NOT EVEN APPEAR for any account whatsoever.
They made the fake check out of whole cloth. Evidently, Wal-Mart did not even bother to find out if the routing number on the check was a real one.
I am filing a police report as soon as I finish filling out that monster document, and if I can help prosecute then I would really like to do just that.
Nihil est ad omnia parte beatum.
I can see...
http://paperclippings.blogspot.com
I can see a small business or an individual not verifying the check's authenticity...but WALMART!!???!!?...
I know that some business even smaller than Walmart verify the check before hand. In some places it is easier to use a credit card than to write a check.
sheeeeeeesh!!!!
DAAAAMMMMMNNN!!!
Good God, man, my condolences! Having helped the Hubby get through ID theft that happened in late 2000 -- and like you, he found out when a collection agency called our apartment, and we thought, "What the hell?" -- the paperwork is a killer. It took months for everything to get straightened out, and we're still paranoid about ID theft, seven years later.
Yes, chocolates. And maybe whiskey.
thank you
Yea, the paperwork is really a disasterous huge pile.
And I know that I am only beginning. I am still really angry at Wal-Mart for one, and I am upset that the other victim (ME) is the one that has to do all the leg-work.
Nihil est ad omnia parte beatum.
Well I've no sympathy for
Well I've no sympathy for you. You come in here stating that someone used your name to make big purchases in your name at Walmart while this very morning you are having new appliances installed in your home. hmmmmm I wonder how much those came to... about $1500 give er take? :P
On a serious note, I had no idea Walmart would take a $1500 check. Of course I avoid writing checks of any size as much as possible so I'm not exactly an expert.
Good luck with the paperwork. It's a lot easier now to deal with this stuff than it was 8 years ago when I had to deal with mine. Back then they wouldn't listen and assumed I was trying to get out of paying my bills, even though I had a stamped passport that proved I was out of the country when the incident took place. I'm sure that doesnt do much to make you feel better but.... it could be worse.
ya, what about that washer and dryer ;)
I am just kidding, of course.
I found an interesting article. http://www.infosecwriters.com/texts.php?op=display&id=146
http://paperclippings.blogspot.com
PS> If you need a good laugh I can recommend a funny story written by a friend of mine.
The Bathroom Stall bwahahahahaha
chocolate
I do hope you are feeling better...I still say you need chocolate.
http://paperclippings.blogspot.com
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